Dream, Little Hamsters
by Quietoutthere
Summary: While on a picnic the Hams fall into a deep sleep. Meanwhile their humans are looking frantically for them but cant find them... just where are they, anyway? This is my first fic!
1. On a picnic

**The Dreaming Hamster Thingy**

_Yes, yes, we don't own Hamtaro, or any of his little friends, or them humans._

One morning, at the clubhouse, all of the ham-hams were having fun having a picnic.

Hamtaro, Boss, Bijou, and Oxnard were all at a blanket, Pashmina, Howdy, Dexter, and Penelope were at a blanket, Sandy, Stan, Maxwell, and Snoozer (for some reason) were at a blanket, and (my favorite characters) **Cappy **and **Panda** were at a blanket having their delectable lunches that were exquisitely and unimaginably so delicious that all of them kept eating their lunches they were all so full that they couldn't even move.

After lunch, since they couldn't move, they decided to take a nap. They slept for hours. Hamtaro dreamt of dancing in the clouds. Boss dreamt of Bijou, being with her, and feeding her grapes. (?) Bijou had dreams of Hamtaro and herself, being in France, what with it's cheese and wine. Oxnard was dreaming of being on a date with Pepper, who had given him mounds and mounds of sunflower seeds. He dreamt of eating them with her.

Penelope, Pashmina, Howdy, and Dexter all decided to take naps too. Howdy dreamt of being a wealthy King-ham and having Pashmina as his Queen-ham with Dexter as their hopeless servant that brought them food and stuff. Dexter dreamt of the same thing as Howdy (except he wasn't the servant). Pashmina dreamt about being in a ravenous paradise filled with pink flowers, clouds, sky, (just about everything was pink) and with Penelope by her side. Penelope didn't have a dream; it was a nightmare. Pashmina died in her nightmare then so did everyone else, so she had to live in a orphanage with a whole bunch of smelly weird other baby-hams and she had to work at a can factory and a clothes hanger factory all at the same time.

Stan was having a dream about dancing with some lady-hams. He was the best in a dancing tournament and won a neat trophy. Sandy dreamt about Maxwell. She dreamt that they were married (tee hee) and had little baby-hams. She was a master gymnast and had lots of trophies around. Maxwell dreamed of being married to Sandy also, but they were in a huge ham-sized library, with all the books he'd ever want to read. Snoozer, who always slept anyway, had dreams of being awake. He'd go on adventures, eat sunflower seeds, play with the other ham-hams, and he was happy and having lots of fun.

**Cappy **was having dreams about going around the world collecting **EVERY SINGLE CAP **there ever was, and then wearing them where ever he went. **Panda** had a dream that he was the most famous and well-known builder in the whole entire ham-universe, he had built the most things in the world more than any other hamster.

All the ham-hams were having wonderful dreams, except Penelope, and they dreamed for hours. They laid there, at their little picnic blankets, and slept. It was getting quite late and if no one woke them up, they would be late in returning to their humans. That would be terrible. But they didn't know it was late because they were sleeping. Otherwise they would be returning. But they were still sleeping, dreaming. What would their humans do if they were missing? Well they had better wake up soon, dang it.

But as luck may have it, the hamsters never woke up, their humans did return home, and each owner did realize that their hamster was missing. The owners of the hamsters were furious. They lit their torches and grabbed their pitchforks and got ready for the hunt for those naughty ham-hams.

The humans searched and searched high and low for the missing naughty ham-hams, but they couldn't find them. They were getting angrier. They threw their pitchforks at people and set the forest ablaze. It was a riot! But some other people joined for no reason, too, they did it for fun! The ham-hams, however, were peacefully dreaming at their secret picnic spot. The humans wanted their hams and started searching around the next town, too. Maybe they were there…

--q-p--

**Woo hoo! Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!**


	2. dream, Hamtaro! dream!

Chapter 2, yay! I don't own any Hamtaro characters, right?

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_The humans… pillaging a confused town…_

While the humans were busy pillaging the horrified and confused town, the Hams were still peacefully (in all but Penelope's case) dreaming away…

"Where are our naughty little hamsters," Laura shrieked, "I love them and they are gone!"

"Laura, calm down," Kana told her, "we'll get them back as long as it doesn't involve looking in the woods on the ground."

Laura sighed, "I guess you're right; they couldn't have scurried into the woods or on the ground… but I'm still angry at these townspeople for not having them!" Laura shouted.

"God I hate those stupid townspeople, lets beat them up for not having our ham hams!" Kana said.

"Oh, where art thou, my lovely Hamtaro," Laura screeched loud enough to shatter the glass windows of the nearby buildings, "Where art thooooouuuuuu!"

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_And in Hamtaro's dream…_

"Where art thou, my lovely Hamtaro? Where art thou?" said Juliet Bijou in the clouds of Hamtaro's dream. "I am here, Juliet Bijou; come, let us fly into the clouds and eat coconuts for the rest of our days," said Hamtaro.

"But of course, my dear," replied Juliet Bijou, "but let us not forget zee sunflower seed banquet later tonight, 'tis an important banquet indeed."

It all seemed perfect…until… a giant meteor is hurdling toward them! What will they do? Who will save them?

"Oh no, Juliet Bijou," called Hamtaro, "If that meteor hits us we will miss our important banquet! And also, the meteor is heading straight for our castle over there! What ever shall we do, my lovely?"

"Hurry, Hamtaro! Use your super powers to save zee banquet!" yelled Juliet Bijou.

"Of course!" said Hamtaro, "I'll use my super negotiating skills!"

"Ah ha ha, I have you now!" shouted the meteor, which somehow developed a face, "prepare to miss your banquet!"

"Not on my watch," Hamtaro told the meteor, "this is a very important banquet and we wont be missing it!"

"You go, my lovely!" Juliet Bijou told Hamtaro.

"Oh, but I am so jealous that you have friends," sniffed the sad meteor.

"What about the other meteors?" asked Hamtaro, "they can be your friends!"

"Oh, I forgot about them, thank you Hamtaro!" said the meteor, and he rushed off back into space to apologize to his meteor pals for being gone. "Sorry Mom, I was trying to make friends with a tiny Hamster in some clouds on Earth!" he told his mother.

"Well… okay, son," she replied, "but next time be home before dinner."

"I will, I will!" the meteor told his mama, "fo' shizzle!"

"Yay, Hamtaro! You talked our way out of not missing a banquet!" said Juliet Bijou, "and now we can feast upon our bountiful sunflower harvest!"

"Yes, my lovely white-furred darling," said Hamtaro, "Let us frolic through the misty fogs and into our castle, in which our banquet guests must already be awaiting our arrival!"

"Oui, and on our way we can buy them presents!" Juliet Bijou said.

"Perfect! Then let's go," replied Hamtaro.

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_Meanwhile… in reality…_

"Agh!" yelled a random townsperson, "what is going on!"

"It's you, isn't it!" bawled Laura, "you have stolen my lovely Hamtaro and you're planning on eating him later! Aren't you!"

"Wh-what?" he replied, "N-no, what are you talking about?"

"Tell me where you hid him!" yelled Laura, but before the villager could reply she ran off to question the next bewildered person, "you have him! Where is he?"

"Who? What are you doing here? What's going on?" he asked. Laura ignored him and shoved him out of the way.

In the other half of town, the mayor is giving a speech…...

"The townsfolk are loosing their minds," The mayor said, "We'll have to capture them and lock them up for good!"

"WOOOO HOOOO!" The 'other' townsfolk cheered. They lit their torches and grabbed their pitchforks and got ready for the search for those naughty townsfolk.

"Wha-?" said Laura, "c'mon guys, run away, but keep searching for those naughty ham-hams!"

"That's right!" agreed Kana, "we have to find them!"

(and they ignored that some people didn't know why they were rioting)

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_Back to Hamtaro's dream…_

"We have to find them!" said Bijou, "we have to find zee perfect presents!"

"How about these cotton candy machines?" asked a store clerk.

"Sold!" said Hamtaro, "right, Bijou?"

"They will love them!" she replied.

Hamtaro and Bijou wrapped the cotton candy machines in sparkly golden wrapping paper with a red giant bow on top. They gave the first cotton candy machine to Cappy.

"Oh, wow!" he exclaimed, "I can totally use this to make a cotton candy hat, thus furthering my extensive hat collection!"

After each Ham got his or her cotton candy machine they began the banquet of a thousand million sunflower seeds.

All of a sudden all of the sunflower seeds exploded and no one got to eat anything except remains of what looked like… doodoo.

And that's when Hamtaro woke up.

"Uuugh, huh? What?" he mumbled, just before breathing in an intoxicating aroma making him more and more drowsy…

"I-(yawns)-I got to… got to stay awake and… and…" but he never finished the sentence because he dozed off again, only seconds after he woke up. What was that scent?

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-q-p-

Yeah, this is kind of goofy, huh? Anyway, each of the following chapters will be dedicated to each of the hamsters dreams along with the confusion that is the rioting humans… heh heh…


	3. dream, Boss! dream!

Chapter 3, Yay! La la la, we…we still don't own any Hamtaro characters… we don't…

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_Within the confides of Boss's dreaming mind…_

"Ah, Bijou," said Boss, "Isn't it a lovely day?"

"Indeed so, Boss" Bijou replied, "a perfect day for our wedding"

"Of course!" he told her, laughing, and trying to sound fancy he said, "no one, no supernatural forces, would have such a glorious event take place in any less fine weather, my dear, as we are blessed to have it be so!"

Unfortunately there was a supernatural force that was about to ruin their lovely day.

A giant Cyclops came down from the heavens and started swinging at them with his giant mallet.

"Argh! I don't want you things to get maaaarriiied!" called the Cyclops.

Boss then dug a giant tunnel through the center of the earth where the Cyclops couldn't find and/or get them! Then Bijou and Boss got married and ate cake and ice cream with sunflower seeds and peanut butter cookies and chocolate bars with peanuts and marshmallows! Plus everything was all warm since they were in the center of the earth.

"Hey, Bij-bij," said Boss, "Want to live here in the center of the earth?"

"Well of course, Bo-bo, that's awesome," Bijou, replied, "awesome."

So Boss hired lots of worker-hams to build him the finest underground home ever in the world, literally, it was seriously _in_ the world. He hired so many workers that it only took 4 hours to build. Then only 1 hour to paint and carpet. So Bijou and Boss went shopping for furniture.

"Do you like this color, husband?" asked Bijou, holding up a blue paint sampler.

"How couldn't I?" he replied, " Your color predilection is simply divine!"

"Oui? You really think so?" glittering as she said the words, "I am really that talented?"

"Sure are!" he yelled, "that's great, huh?"

"Uh, YEAH!" she said back.

So after they bought all the finest (and most expensive) furniture they rode their golden kayak down the milk river leading to their titanium glass home… if that's possible.

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_Within the confides of a pandemonium-ridden reality…_

"Where's my beautiful hamster, old person?" Kana asked an old person.

"I predict that your hammy whammies are in my back pocket," Old Person said.

"What?" Kana asked bewilderedly, "Are they okay? You're smashing them!"

"CALM DOWN!" Old Person said, "DON'T YELL AT ME!"

Old Person pulled two lumps of coal out of his pocket and gave them to Kana.

"Oxy!" she exclaimed, "what is this coal-like substance that covers your entire body, thus making you look like a medium-sized piece of coal found in an old person's pocket!"

"I found him in a bag in the grocery store, I'm afraid he didn't make it."

"Wh-what?" she asked, "didn't make it?"

"HE'S DEAD, KANA! DEAD!" screeched Laura, who was secretly listening to the whole thing.

"No!" said Oldie the Person; friend of Old Person, "he just never made it to the vegetable aisle!"

"What in heck is that supposed to mean?" yelled Laura.

"It'll be okay, Laura," said Travis, who was suddenly there, "That's just a coal."

"Oh my gosh! It's Travis!" Laura screamed, "I LOVE YOU TRAVIS!"

"Good bye!" he said, ignoring Laura, "Good bye! Good bye! I can't stay for too long, sorry! G'bye!"

"Isn't Travis cool? Oh my gosh!" Laura sung.

"Sure, I guess," replied Kana.

"I like him," said Old Person.

"Me too," said Oldie the old person.

"But I like him most so you guys back o-off!" yelled Laura.

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_Back to unreality…_

"And shall we start dinner, my lovely?" asked Bijou.

"Oh yes, 'he replied, "yes indeed. Maids! Tell the cooks to fix us up some fancy rich people grub! Pronto!" So they ate a marvelously prepared feast of seeds and veggies and all those things hamsters like to eat.

"Ah, what a marvelously prepared feast, my darling," said Bijou.

"'Twas a fine meal," Boss replied popping the last of the luscious hamster-sized grapes into Bijous mouth, "a fine meal indeed."

"Oui, and these grapes are indubitably superb," she said, "as if I am eating magic spheres of joy!"

"Magic spheres of joy!" Boss repeated.

After their superfluous banquet they meandered about their new home in hopes of finding a bathroom… unfortunately, however, the house was incredibly large and they got lost very easily.

"Where in the world are we?" asked Bijou, growing impatient.

"I do not know!" said Boss, "if only we had a map!"

Just then a magic map popped out of nowhere and said, "Yo, homies! I's here ta help y'all find yer way t' the bathroom!"

"Oh, map! We need help!" said Bijou, "can you help us find the bathroom?"

"… that's what I _said_ I was going to do…" said the map, confused.

"Please? We have to find it!" Bijou pleaded.

"But I said I _would_! That's why I'm here!" the map yelled.

"But map we need your help!" Bijou pleaded once again.

"This way!" the map said, giving up on telling her he already said he was helping.

"Map!" Bijou yelled, "mappy, come back! Nooooo!"

"Bijou, let's follow him," said Boss, attempting to calm Bijou down, "he's leading us to the bathroom."

"Follow him!" said Bijou. They were lead to the fancy marble bathrooms and after successfully emptying their bladders headed off to bed.

"Nighty night, Bossy," said Bijou.

"Sweet dreams, my lovely," replied Boss, Slipping into another dream…

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-q-p-

I'm not sure I'm thinking when I write these…


End file.
